Juliet to Romeo: What's in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet.*
Zak and I are a good team. He's a great husband and I know I'm a great wife. I always know how to make him laugh. I can tell when a bad day at work means he needs a hug or that he needs some down time when he gets home. I cook him (from scratch) three meals a day at least six days of the week. These are some of the things that make our relationship better. But there's one area of being a wife that I've totally failed at, ever since saying "I do" fifteen months ago.
I'm yet to change my name.
Juliet said to Romeo that a name was just a name, it wasn't important. Who cared that she was a Capulet and he was a Montague? It was JUST A NAME. Well, Jules, I beg to differ.
There are a number of reasons, maybe even excuses, why I haven't done this yet. First off, I love my maiden name. It's nothing against his surname, but I love mine. I've known it and had it for nearly 27 years now, and I'm extremely proud of my family. It keeps me connected to my roots. I'm very proud to be English, and I have married and resided in Texas with a Texan. Our kids (if any) will be more Texan than English. So my brain has made the drastic jump to "last name of a Texan = no longer English." I know that's silly (I never promised my reasons would be logical). The third reason even trumps the validity of the second reason. I am actually STILL English, by every sense of the law. I'm not a U.S. citizen. This leads me to the third reason. Do you know how expensive it will be to change all of those documents just so I can add a name to it all? The answer is very. And I mean it when I say "add" a name and not "change." I originally thought that although it would be difficult to not have my maiden name be a part of my main identity anymore, I could always just make my maiden name my middle name (I don't have a middle name) and then take on the new surname. I was pleased with that idea, and was going to change my name within the first 6 months of marriage. Then somehing happened. My mother-in-law pointed out that we'd then have the same initials. And as flimsy as it is, it is this last reason that's truly prevented me from legally changing things up.
Zak's asked me that I change my name for his birthday present, which is a little over a month away. So it's time to do some serious thinking and make a choice: stick to what I've known for over two decades, or swallow my pride for the man I love.
* from Romeo and Juliet, William Shakespeare
Showing posts with label me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label me. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Like A Kid Who Snorted A Pixie Stick
Hurrah! BIG day! BIG news! I've done it! I've closed my first sale! I started my job 7 months ago and have been training up to this moment, learning about the industry I'm in, gaining technical knowledge, creating presentations, and now the title on my business card actually means something.
The sale was closed within my first ten minutes in the office today and as a result, the rest of the day's been a whirlwind. This isn't just my first sale in my current position, this is my first sale ever (apart from 2 years working in retail while in college). It's shown me that I am capable and professional, and I feel genuinely appreciated by my colleagues. My boss (semi-jokingly) dubbed me "star of the day" and (seriously) told that I handled the client and sale very well, and I even got a congratulatory email from the CEO in Oslo. I know I work for a small company so there aren't as many steps between me and the CEO, but I'm going to let myself feel proud of that email.
It's amazing what one achievement will do for your confidence. I've had to stop myself from practically skipping on my way to the water cooler or colleagues offices. Zak asked me how I felt after I told him and I blurted out "like a kid who's snorted a pixie stick!" It was the only thing that came to mind that described how excited and buzzed I felt. Suddenly I feel like I can achieve anything. My mind is running a mile a minute of all the things I've been wanting to learn or get back into but haven't allowed myself the confidence to actually do it. But now I don't feel that there's anything to hold me back. So watch this space, big things are coming....
The sale was closed within my first ten minutes in the office today and as a result, the rest of the day's been a whirlwind. This isn't just my first sale in my current position, this is my first sale ever (apart from 2 years working in retail while in college). It's shown me that I am capable and professional, and I feel genuinely appreciated by my colleagues. My boss (semi-jokingly) dubbed me "star of the day" and (seriously) told that I handled the client and sale very well, and I even got a congratulatory email from the CEO in Oslo. I know I work for a small company so there aren't as many steps between me and the CEO, but I'm going to let myself feel proud of that email.
It's amazing what one achievement will do for your confidence. I've had to stop myself from practically skipping on my way to the water cooler or colleagues offices. Zak asked me how I felt after I told him and I blurted out "like a kid who's snorted a pixie stick!" It was the only thing that came to mind that described how excited and buzzed I felt. Suddenly I feel like I can achieve anything. My mind is running a mile a minute of all the things I've been wanting to learn or get back into but haven't allowed myself the confidence to actually do it. But now I don't feel that there's anything to hold me back. So watch this space, big things are coming....
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Things always happen in 3s
The last week has been tough. I know life's always meant to throw these curveballs at you, but the last week felt like I was trapped in a batting cage with the pitching machine cranking out fast balls and me without a helmet and a bat. (That's my American-ism for the day)
I was brought up with the notion of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and the concept that you just had to take the bad things in your stride. But when it's one thing after another, you do start to wonder...."when is this going to stop?" I believe that all things come in sets of three. Well believe me, I had my three last week. And they were all totally out of character for me. First, I dropped the ball at work. I knew it was meant to happen at some point, but the way it all came about made me feel sick and left thinking that my reprimand wasn't entirely professional. Then later that evening, as I dropped a 17-inch widescreen laptop on my toe, splitting the nail in half, and creating lots of blood and bruising. I'm not a clumsy person and I'm not prone to injurying myself. I took it as a sign that I was just exhausted after the bad day at work and opted for vodka on the rocks over Ibuprofen.
The third bad thing was a bit of a shock. It was two days later over the weekend. The day before had been Zak's birthday and we had a great time going out, and then that day we'd had a very successful barbeque. I was in the kitchen doing dishes from the party and had just poured myself a glass of wine to go in the living room and finally put my feet up. What I didn't know was that the universe had other plans. For some reason I had no idea that our 65 pound dog, Sheila, had laid down right beside my feet. I turned full force ready to start walking and went flying. I came crashing down on the tile floor, with my knee taking most of the shock. My head also hit the floor (no concussion, but minor whip lash) and the crystal glass shattered, slitting my finger open. I've never fallen like that before in my life, not even as a kid. So now I'm still hobbling around with a knee twice the size of the other.
So I've had my three bad things. Time for the cosmos to send something good my way.
I was brought up with the notion of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and the concept that you just had to take the bad things in your stride. But when it's one thing after another, you do start to wonder...."when is this going to stop?" I believe that all things come in sets of three. Well believe me, I had my three last week. And they were all totally out of character for me. First, I dropped the ball at work. I knew it was meant to happen at some point, but the way it all came about made me feel sick and left thinking that my reprimand wasn't entirely professional. Then later that evening, as I dropped a 17-inch widescreen laptop on my toe, splitting the nail in half, and creating lots of blood and bruising. I'm not a clumsy person and I'm not prone to injurying myself. I took it as a sign that I was just exhausted after the bad day at work and opted for vodka on the rocks over Ibuprofen.
The third bad thing was a bit of a shock. It was two days later over the weekend. The day before had been Zak's birthday and we had a great time going out, and then that day we'd had a very successful barbeque. I was in the kitchen doing dishes from the party and had just poured myself a glass of wine to go in the living room and finally put my feet up. What I didn't know was that the universe had other plans. For some reason I had no idea that our 65 pound dog, Sheila, had laid down right beside my feet. I turned full force ready to start walking and went flying. I came crashing down on the tile floor, with my knee taking most of the shock. My head also hit the floor (no concussion, but minor whip lash) and the crystal glass shattered, slitting my finger open. I've never fallen like that before in my life, not even as a kid. So now I'm still hobbling around with a knee twice the size of the other.
So I've had my three bad things. Time for the cosmos to send something good my way.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Boston Bound (in 3 months)
As you all know from my first blog, I love to travel. Unfortunately, life has not allowed me to do that as much as I would like in recent years. The last time I went anywhere was in May 2009 to Florida, when Zak proposed. It was a wonderful trip, but we stayed with his uncle, so it wasn't quite a full vacation.
This year I made it one of my new year's resolutions to have a holiday. Not just staying with family members, but a full-on sleep in hotels, do what we want on our time, holiday. In addition to Florida, Zak and I have only been on holiday one other time: 2008 when he met me in Holland (for a day) and then we had 3 weeks in England for him to see my home and meet the relatives. It was an incredible time, but like Florida, staying with relatives starts to wear on you after a while!
Well as of Tuesday, I am officially set to fulfill one of my resolutions (unlike the others such as drink less wine, not be so sarcastic and judgemental, etc). In May, Zak and I will have 5 days in New England. We're flying into Boston and are going to spend our time seeing as much as possible of the region, while also getting to spend a weekend with his brother who's in Submarine School for the Navy. Both Zak and I are history buffs and so the opportunity to go to this part of the U.S. is really exciting for us. Also, I've worked out that yet again I won't be able to make it back to England this year and after some research, Boston seems to have a very English look and weather to it.
We have booked our tickets and told Zak's brother (which made his day), and are looking forward to the next steps: renting a car and finding hotels. I can't wait to have the Atlantic sea air in my face, cobble-stone streets beneath my feet, May temperatures in the 50s, and drunk and angry Irish-Americans singing at a pub. Ahhhhhh, it's almost like being back at home. :)
This year I made it one of my new year's resolutions to have a holiday. Not just staying with family members, but a full-on sleep in hotels, do what we want on our time, holiday. In addition to Florida, Zak and I have only been on holiday one other time: 2008 when he met me in Holland (for a day) and then we had 3 weeks in England for him to see my home and meet the relatives. It was an incredible time, but like Florida, staying with relatives starts to wear on you after a while!
Well as of Tuesday, I am officially set to fulfill one of my resolutions (unlike the others such as drink less wine, not be so sarcastic and judgemental, etc). In May, Zak and I will have 5 days in New England. We're flying into Boston and are going to spend our time seeing as much as possible of the region, while also getting to spend a weekend with his brother who's in Submarine School for the Navy. Both Zak and I are history buffs and so the opportunity to go to this part of the U.S. is really exciting for us. Also, I've worked out that yet again I won't be able to make it back to England this year and after some research, Boston seems to have a very English look and weather to it.
We have booked our tickets and told Zak's brother (which made his day), and are looking forward to the next steps: renting a car and finding hotels. I can't wait to have the Atlantic sea air in my face, cobble-stone streets beneath my feet, May temperatures in the 50s, and drunk and angry Irish-Americans singing at a pub. Ahhhhhh, it's almost like being back at home. :)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
The first post
A few weeks ago, a good friend of mine started a blog. It was one of her new year's resolutions to try having a blog for a year, so that come 2012 she could look back and see what she'd learned and achieved in the last 365 days. I find that as some what of an inspiration.
I'm not quite as sure about what I'm wanting to achieve with this....inner peace? To find my voice? To be a bit more open? I don't know yet. Maybe I'll find out along the way and maybe I won't. Either way, the concept of a blog has always interested me and I've admired the people who are bold enough to put their lives out there for the public to view.
A little bit about me....I'm English and live in Texas. Towards the end of 2010 I married my wonderful husband after 4 years of being together. We have a dog and a pet rabbit. They are our children, and I'm sure there will be many stories about them on this blog. I'm very close to my family, my immediate family is the only family living outside of the UK. After 20 years living abroad and away from your relatives, I suppose it's only natural that you come so close to your parents and siblings. Afterall, they're the only family around when it comes to the holidays (which is something I enjoy. There's never any bickering about who's house we have to go to and which side of the family gets visited the most at Christmas, etc). My interests are traveling (bank balance and holiday time permitting), reading, cooking, and photography. It all sounds a bit cliche, but it's true. I get a huge kick out of finishing a book, experimenting in the kitchen, getting lost in a new place, and I have named my camera in the way that people name their children (it's Dennis by the way).
So there's the basic rundown of me and my life. The past has been interesting and diverse, and I just hope that the future is just as colourful.
I'm not quite as sure about what I'm wanting to achieve with this....inner peace? To find my voice? To be a bit more open? I don't know yet. Maybe I'll find out along the way and maybe I won't. Either way, the concept of a blog has always interested me and I've admired the people who are bold enough to put their lives out there for the public to view.
A little bit about me....I'm English and live in Texas. Towards the end of 2010 I married my wonderful husband after 4 years of being together. We have a dog and a pet rabbit. They are our children, and I'm sure there will be many stories about them on this blog. I'm very close to my family, my immediate family is the only family living outside of the UK. After 20 years living abroad and away from your relatives, I suppose it's only natural that you come so close to your parents and siblings. Afterall, they're the only family around when it comes to the holidays (which is something I enjoy. There's never any bickering about who's house we have to go to and which side of the family gets visited the most at Christmas, etc). My interests are traveling (bank balance and holiday time permitting), reading, cooking, and photography. It all sounds a bit cliche, but it's true. I get a huge kick out of finishing a book, experimenting in the kitchen, getting lost in a new place, and I have named my camera in the way that people name their children (it's Dennis by the way).
So there's the basic rundown of me and my life. The past has been interesting and diverse, and I just hope that the future is just as colourful.
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