Time flies!

It seems every year, every month, people are commenting on how quickly time is passing.  "This year's really flying by," or "I can't believe it's already May - wasn't it just Christmas?", are phrases that never seem to be far away.

Well not to sound cliche, but this year really IS flying by.  The last couple of weeks have been busy both at work and at home.  I knew I was in for a busy week at work when on Monday of last week I didn't get home until 11.45 pm, which is much later than the standard 5.00 or 5.30.  I knew I was in for a busy week at home when I looked at my calendar yesterday morning and saw that Zak and I have something planned every day for the next 7 days.  And it looks as if things aren't really going to slow down from here.

Only just now am I about to enter the busiest part of the year so far.  With work, next month is the last month of Q1 and I have quotas to meet.  After that it's trade show season so I'll be travelling quite a bit with that.  At home it's Zak's birthday coming up and then my sister's wedding in the first week of May.  This means that between now and then not only will there be bridal showers and hen nights to attend, but as maid of honour (or I guess matron of honour, seeing as I'm married) much time will be spent planning those things.  Factor into that all of life's daily routines and surprises, and I'm in for a busy few months. 

Luckily, I like being busy.  I'd rather have too much to do than too little.  And I like the responsibilities I have both at home and at work.  However, for all my excellent skills as a multi-tasker, this will be a bit challenging for me.  At least there will be plenty of photo opportunities to play with the new camera, right?

I've set my light at the end of the tunnel (the calm after the storm) to be Memorial Day weekend, the last weekend in May.  This should be interesting.

Little Bundle of Joy

In 27 hours I will be leaving work tomorrow to collect my newest "baby."  A little Canon called the S100 is nearly mine, only just big enough to fit in the palm of my hand.

I'm picky with my cameras.  I don't have unlimited resources to buy the biggest and best, and I don't buy often.  In fact that last camera I bought was over two years ago and it was a cheap and cheerful - yet surprisingly powerful - point and shoot.  Before that the last camera I got was Dennis, my Canon 20D DSLR.  I've known for a long time that Dennis is slightly out dated in terms of MP and filters and a bit low on ISO speed.  But he's mine.  I couldn't possibly replace him.

So that's why I'm going for the S100.  It will take the place of my point and shoot, but the difference is that it's not as cheap and a hell of a lot more cheerful.  It will be my "D-not an SLR but takes a damn good picture like an SLR" camera that I can easily take with me anywhere. 

The last time I felt so excited about a new arrival was the day before Zak and I picked up Pandora from the SPCA after her snip-snip op.  Okay, that day was much bigger and more exciting, but I can't wait to get my hands on this camera, see everything it can do, and share the pictures with you.

Tough Love

Criticism is a difficult thing for many people.  It can be hard to receive, and depending on who's on the receiving end of the criticism, it can be tough to give.

Spending the better part of my 26 years in art classes, photography courses, and even a degree in advertising, critiques have been a major part of my life.  Weekly critiques on paintings, photographs, and campaign ideas taught me to listen to other people's opinions, respect those opinions, and see what I could change or do differently next time.  The critiques weren't always easy to sit through.  One art teacher would very gently encourage me to be a bit bolder with my use of graphite pencils, one advertising professor used his Glaswegian flair by telling me an idea was "f*cking sh*te."  Charming.

So I've developed an appreciation of the critique.  Getting critiqued sits well with me.  Giving the critique doesn't.  Recently I've found myself at a particularly awkward crossroad.  I have to give someone that I'm close to, a very harsh critique.  One of my in-laws has driven Zak and myself to a state of hopelessness.  Their presence is overbearing, their attitude rude, and their manners non-existent.  Not every member of your family is going to be your favourite person, I know that.  You can choose your friends, not your family.  But after watching this person's behaviour become increasingly worse over the last few years, and a very stressful weekend with them, Zak and I have to say something.

It will be tasteful, we will let them know we're doing this out of love and not spite, but that doesn't make it any easier.  This critique will be tough, for both parties.  I just hope that in time it will produce a positive result.

What's In a Name?

Juliet to Romeo:  What's in a name?  That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet.*

Zak and I are a good team.  He's a great husband and I know I'm a great wife.  I always know how to make him laugh.  I can tell when a bad day at work means he needs a hug or that he needs some down time when he gets home.  I cook him (from scratch) three meals a day at least six days of the week.  These are some of the things that make our relationship better.  But there's one area of being a wife that I've totally failed at, ever since saying "I do" fifteen months ago.

I'm yet to change my name.

Juliet said to Romeo that a name was just a name, it wasn't important.  Who cared that she was a Capulet and he was a Montague?  It was JUST A NAME.  Well, Jules, I beg to differ.

There are a number of reasons, maybe even excuses, why I haven't done this yet.  First off, I love my maiden name.  It's nothing against his surname, but I love mine.  I've known it and had it for nearly 27 years now, and I'm extremely proud of my family.  It keeps me connected to my roots.  I'm very proud to be English, and I have married and resided in Texas with a Texan.  Our kids (if any) will be more Texan than English.  So my brain has made the drastic jump to "last name of a Texan = no longer English."  I know that's silly (I never promised my reasons would be logical).  The third reason even trumps the validity of the second reason.  I am actually STILL English, by every sense of the law.  I'm not a U.S. citizen.  This leads me to the third reason.  Do you know how expensive it will be to change all of those documents just so I can add a name to it all?  The answer is very.  And I mean it when I say "add" a name and not "change."  I originally thought that although it would be difficult to not have my maiden name be a part of my main identity anymore, I could always just make my maiden name my middle name (I don't have a middle name) and then take on the new surname.  I was pleased with that idea, and was going to change my name within the first 6 months of marriage.  Then somehing happened.  My mother-in-law pointed out that we'd then have the same initials.  And as flimsy as it is, it is this last reason that's truly prevented me from legally changing things up.

Zak's asked me that I change my name for his birthday present, which is a little over a month away.  So it's time to do some serious thinking and make a choice:  stick to what I've known for over two decades, or swallow my pride for the man I love.


* from Romeo and Juliet, William Shakespeare

Dennis

Yesterday evening, while celebrating my big day with some prosecco, I reacquainted myself with an old friend.  Dennis.  That's what I've named my Canon 20D that I got nearly 6 years ago for my 21st birthday.  For the longest time I didn't go anywhere without my camera and I was constantly inspired.  Then life evolved and I had to put more focus on my future, and I ended up with less free time.  So for the last two years my relationship with Dennis has suffered, and we only saw each other for special occassions. 

So last night, feeling like I could do anything, I sat in the garden and took some pictures.  I like to shoot with natural light and I don't like to edit my photos after taking them.  I fell in love with the classic darkroom environment, the basics of photography, and never experimented past what nature gave me.  When I lived in England I wanted to take pictures of everything:  scenery, architecture, people....so much was so close to your doorstep.  In Texas I feel I lack creativity.  It's not that beautiful scenery, architecture, and people don't exist in Texas, it's just that it's all so much further away.  So yesterday I stuck close to home, cranked up some Calvin Harris/Avicii/Deadmau5 on the outdoor surround sound, and took some pictures of the dogs, the prosecco, and even managed to get a self-portrait done.  Here are the results:

Sheila, my baby girl

Pandora, my little one, and Sheila

Me

Heaven in a glass

Like A Kid Who Snorted A Pixie Stick

Hurrah!  BIG day!  BIG news!  I've done it!  I've closed my first sale!  I started my job 7 months ago and have been training up to this moment, learning about the industry I'm in, gaining technical knowledge, creating presentations, and now the title on my business card actually means something.

The sale was closed within my first ten minutes in the office today and as a result, the rest of the day's been a whirlwind.  This isn't just my first sale in my current position, this is my first sale ever (apart from 2 years working in retail while in college).  It's shown me that I am capable and professional, and I feel genuinely appreciated by my colleagues.  My boss (semi-jokingly) dubbed me "star of the day" and (seriously) told that I handled the client and sale very well, and I even got a congratulatory email from the CEO in Oslo.  I know I work for a small company so there aren't as many steps between me and the CEO, but I'm going to let myself feel proud of that email.

It's amazing what one achievement will do for your confidence.  I've had to stop myself from practically skipping on my way to the water cooler or colleagues offices.  Zak asked me how I felt after I told him and I blurted out "like a kid who's snorted a pixie stick!"  It was the only thing that came to mind that described how excited and buzzed I felt.  Suddenly I feel like I can achieve anything.  My mind is running a mile a minute of all the things I've been wanting to learn or get back into but haven't allowed myself the confidence to actually do it.  But now I don't feel that there's anything to hold me back.  So watch this space, big things are coming....

You Get What You Ask For

A couple of days ago I wrote a gloomy post about some gloomy weather.  All I wanted was something in the weather to change, regardless of what it may be.  Well, careful what you ask for.  Today my part of Texas has seven weather warnings:  a tornado watch, strong wind advisory, flash flood warning, two flood warnings, and two severe storm warnings.  The rain is so hard you can barely see anything, the sky is as black as night, and the roar of the wind is chilling.  The storms are coming from the west and cities that experienced this weather a few hours before us are at a stand still with flooded motorways and blown down trees and power lines.  We had a power outage for a couple of hours in the middle of the night and I woke up with a start at the sound of the wind.  But now the real storms have hit, the kind that show up as deep purple on the weather radar.

Now we've had worse weather here before, but we went through this just 16 days ago, and once in January is unusual for us.  Twice is almost hard to believe.  But the weather has caused the change on my mood that I was hoping for.  No, I'm not happily skipping about that there could be houses and buildings damaged, people hurt.  But this weather snapped me out of my winter blues funk as soon as I woke up at 2.30 this morning.  This weather makes you alert; everybody's a little more cautious and almost compassionate.  I've had a call from my mum asking me to let her know when I got to work safely and Zak is keeping in touch more than usual.

I have a vivid imagination, and so when something dark happens my mind can't help flickering over the idea of the worst.  I've spent the morning worried about my mum if she tries to go out to any shops, and if our dogs Pandora and Sheila are okay at home alone (Pandora doesn't like storms very much.  She looks around nervously from window to window.  I'm trying to tell myself that she's curling up to big sister Sheila for support).  Hell, I'm even wondering if the squirrels that live in our backgarden and constantly torment the dogs are okay.

On the flip side, this type of weather does make me a little happy.  When not contemplating the potential dangers of this weather, I excitedly think about how when I get home I'm going to sit in front of the fireplace with a massive cup of tea and a good book, or have a long relaxing bath while the rain beats down on the window next to me, or watch one of my guilty pleasure films with a glass of good wine and a thick blanket.  Knowing my luck, by the time I'm home from work today the sun will be back out.  But until then, it's nice being out of the funk and having something else to think about.